Legal definition of polygamy: Surprise!

SchrodingersCat

Active member
I'm sure most of us have heard about the recent ruling in Utah that polygamy is no longer illegal. However, it does not give them the legal right to "legally marry" multiple people, only that living with multiple people in a marriage-like relationship is no longer illegal.

I did some digging, and realized that what many of us consider to be completely kosher... totally isn't. Legally, I mean. Ethically Shmethically.

It depends on the jurisdiction of course. But in most of North America, having a legally married spouse, and living with another person in a conjugal relationship (defined as "marriage-like," as in being in a romantic relationship, sharing household responsibilities, being financially linked, sharing parenting responsibilities) is legally defined as polygamy, and is still illegal.

All along, we've been operating on here as though it's only illegal to get two marriage licenses, go down to the courthouse twice, and marry two people, without getting a divorce in between. Nope! Actually, even living in the same house with your two partners, having sex and sharing responsibilities, is illegal even if you don't legally marry either one of them.

Apparently, even having a religious / spiritual ceremony counts as entering a conjugal union, even if you don't live together or share household responsibilities, and is therefore illegal. I've seen many people suggest on here that this is completely legal because you're not getting legally married, but apparently that is not the case.

For the record, "cheating" is still perfectly legal. There's no law forbidding you from having a spouse at home, and a girlfriend or boyfriend that you go visit and have dates with. Different matter for divorce court, of course, and depends even more on the jurisdiction. But not legally considered to be polygamy.

I totally did not know that. Did you?
 
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I did know that. Because I get bored and I researched it once. I didn't spend much time CARING. lol.
But when we were considering moving to the states, I researched it.

It's pretty crazy huh?
It's totally legal to be a sneaky asshole.
But if you want to be honest and upfront OH HELL NO.
;)
 
It's pretty crazy huh?
It's totally legal to be a sneaky asshole.
Have you heard about US Politicians? :D ;)

Of course it's legal to be sneaky and/or an asshole!
 
The Law is one of the reasons we're still in the closet. :( The handfasting ceremony we had, if found out by the authorities, would only seal our fate.

Unless a/the judge/s just don't care/don't consider it worth their time. Lord knows plenty of silly outdated laws remain on the books, and politicians don't bother to repeal them. Because you don't get any points for repealing old laws, only for passing new laws. :mad:

Of course, politicians also tend to perceive themselves as being above the Law ...
 
"We would like to apologize for the way in which politicians are represented in this programme. It was never our intention to imply that politicians are weak-kneed, political time-servers who are more concerned with their personal vendettas and private power struggles than the problems of government. Nor to suggest at any point that they sacrifice their credibility by denying free debate on vital matters in the mistaken impression that party unity comes before the well-being of the people they supposedly represent. Nor to imply at any stage that they are squabbling little toadies without an ounce of concern for the vital social problems of today. Nor indeed do we intend that viewers should consider them as crabby, ulcerous, little self-seeking vermin with furry legs and an excessive addiction to alcohol and certain explicit sexual practices which some people might find offensive. We are sorry if this impression has come across."
-- Monty Python's Flying Circus, the War Against Pornography
 
Hm... I thought it may have been this forum but maybe not. Someone posted a link to a site that had cohabitation legalities by state. I'll have to try to dig that up.
 
Would be interested in it.
 
Well, I found this thread...

Which pointed to this one...

But there's this link, which seems to be fairly thorough (as of 2011). Searching for "legal" on the site will get you the other states as well.
 
Hmmm, seems to only go up to N-Ne. D'oh! (I need a W.)
 
Aw, nerts.
If you stand on your head, you've got an "M".

I'm poking around a bit more, but that's the best one I've seen so far. It's too bad it's incomplete. :(
 
Eh, not the end of the world, just was curious. Ironically if I was still in New Mexico I could still look up my home state.

I'm assuming Washington State has more forgiving poly laws than many other states ... but who knows.
 
Here's the one I remember finding before: (the link is to the Pennsylvania post - but I think he has them all covered...as of 2011)

Non-Monogamous Discourse

From there I remember looking up the PA bigamy law...and then looking up the maximum possible sentence ( one and two years in jail, and/or a $5000 fine).

meh.

JaneQ
 
The judge ruled that Utah's law had been used by the state to prosecute those who by virtue of their religious faith, entered into a plural relationship. Utah however did not prosecute people who simply lived together. While other states have similar laws, those laws are rarely, if ever enforced, since the defining item is being legally married. My take is that if poly relationships are not comprised of "legally" married persons, then no bigamy laws are being broken. If states did prosecute this narrow interpretation of bigamy, then they would have to arrest the millions of ppl who simply live together. Personally i don't give a rip what the state laws say, the government has no business who i love and how many. It's too bad the judge didn't strike down the governments regulation of marriage, but American politics isn't ready for that yet. If you look into how the civil authorities got into the marriage business (before 1600 there was no involvement) you'll notice it was the church's attempt to stop unregulated combination with "undesirable" ppl. These religiously based laws are the same that prohibited ppl of different races from even living together, much less getting married.
 
I do agree that it's none of the government's business.

From what I can see, though, cohabitation in multiple conjugal relationships (not necessarily legally married, but having a marriage-like relationship) is technically against the law.

I certainly wasn't implying that men in black suits were going to haul y'all out in the middle of the night and put you in guantanamo bay. I just always like to have a good understanding of which laws I'm breaking before I break them.

I also like to inform people when they're breaking the law so that they can say "meh, I'll take my chances" vs "meh, it's not like I'm breaking the law."

I do know one or two people IRL, not poly but that's not relevant, who will refrain from doing anything illegal because they view government laws as a basis for morality. I think these people are sadly deluded, but to each their own.

It's also illegal in Saskatoon to spit in public. But when I've got gross yuck in my mouth, you think I'm going to hold it there until I can find a tissue?
 
Well, this isn't a list of states or anything... but here's a very recent interesting ruling that may have applications to this issue:

Yup. That's the "recent ruling in Utah" to which I was referring. I was too lazy to find a reference, thank you for doing the leg work. :)
 
I find this legality stuff very interesting. Would be nice to know the laws concerning polygamy / polyamory in other countries, too. International folks here, do you know the laws of your own country?
 
As a lawyer friend explained to me, I live in PA, as long as we do not try to get a marriage license we can not be charged with bigamy. Because e have not entered into the legal contract required for marriage.

I could be charged with adultery BUT legal system is burdened enough so the chances of that are like a snowball in hell. Adultery is mainly used in divorce. Since I am not getting a divorce that issue is null and void.

Really the only backlash we could face is in public and family opinion.
 
Re (from Oldpolyman):
"My take is that if poly relationships are not comprised of 'legally' married persons, then no bigamy laws are being broken."

My family history, at least, tells a different story. My great-grandfather was (legally) married to two women I think, right around the time when the church and government were joining ranks to condemn/outlaw the practice. Said great-grandfather ended up "choosing" one wife, and stopped cohabiting with the other (my great-grandmother). In this way he (without divorcing her) was able to avoid being punished (and I believe he'd been repeatedly jailed and fined when he was taking turns living at each woman's house), though needless to say it had a terrible effect on the rejected wife and her kids (his with her; among them my maternal grandfather). He still visited her on occasion but their marriage became increasingly strained, and after an incident where he was beating the kids, the ensuing argument ended with a divorce (and the end of their relationship).

Cohabitation (especially but not necessarily with conjugation) seems to remain a big deal on the books in all States. Utah may be the first to say that cohabitation is okay even if legal/lawful marriage to multiple spouse is not okay.

As I said, lots of old/outdated laws on the books and they need to be repealed.

Re:
"If states did prosecute this narrow interpretation of bigamy, then they would have to arrest the millions of people who simply live together."

That's true and illustrates why polyamory can be practiced in the States. But even now in Utah, I'm not sure the State would look kindly on someone "caught" having a commitment ceremony with multiple partners. Looks too much like a wedding ceremony.

In most cases, one only falls afoul of the anti-bigamy Law if one breaks a more serious law, such as having sex with a minor (e.g. child brides). If the prosecutor can't find proof that one broke the more serious law, he/she might settle for asking a judge to throw the book at one for breaking the bigamy law. Likewise if one seriously angers the State and can't get enough popular support to scare the State off.

It's a legally gray area but the shade is dark enough to scare my immediate companions at least out of going public.

Re:
"The government has no business who I love and how many."

Of course. But if they do go after someone, that someone can be sorely punished and so we see that a right in theory isn't always honored in practice.
 
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