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Old 10-13-2011, 07:04 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,732

Cheating is not acceptable in a responsible/ethical poly relationship. Do some research on here and see what you can find in terms of this situation... a tag search for "cheating" will bring up many threads on this topic and how it has effected everyone involved. He feels guilty because he is destroying another persons trust, faith and his commitment to her. Very valid and his gut is telling him something that he is not listening to.

I can understand that he is unhappy. This marriage he is in is over and neither of them are doing something to move on. I suggest he leave her or fess up. It has hardly ever come to pass that this ends in good things. If he cheats on her he will cheat on you. In my opinion its cowardly behaviour and extremely damaging to all those involved. There is no integrity in it and that to me is one of the strongest foundations of poly.

Frankly, this isn't poly at all. Its about you helping him cheat on his wife that he no longer has a relationship with. He wants one with you and is too chicken shit to end his marriage. It sounds like he has no intention of making it work with his wife.
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Last edited by redpepper; 10-13-2011 at 07:08 AM.
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