Another Newbie...Hi!

BSP83

New member
I've been lurking here for a couple of weeks and thought I'd finally take a moment to introduce myself.

I'll go by B. I'm married to P for 11 years, and S is our girlfriend. This is a recent change, as she was just my girlfriend until about 2 weeks ago. She and I dated 2 years ago but there were issues with her husband and we stopped. We got back together in October. She is now divorced.

Adding to this mess, P and I have 3 kids (10, 6, and 3) and S has 2 kids (8 and 4). P and I live in our house with our kids, and S lives in hers with her kids (xdh takes them every weekend).

And if that weren't crazy enough, P and I have a Wife-Led Marriage. He is very submissive. I tend to switch, but in every day life, I love being the more dominant partner. P wears a chastity device when I choose to make him. We are currently in discussions with S about her holding a key as well.

So, as you can see, we are all new to this (none of us have been in a poly relationship before) and learning the ropes. We know we want to be a closed triad, at least for now. P has interest in testing the waters with another man, but is still far off from it. I've not really seen people with our same situation with the WLM in addition to the triad. Any advice, thoughts, etc. are welcomed! We live in Utah, so as you can imagine, it can be hard for us to imagine ever being able to live the way we want to without fear and judgement. I know this is probably true in every state, but here there is definitely a huge issue with these "alternative lifestyles".

I've enjoyed reading about the highs and lows and have learned a lot already from this board (and I picked up The Ethical Slut yesterday!) and I look forward to learning more. :)
 
Greetings B,
Welcome to our forum.

I grew up in Utah and have friends and family there, so I can sympathize with the difficulties posed by living any kind of alternative lifestyle. Sounds like you guys all have a full plate, with the kids and that.

Glad to hear Polyamory.com has been helpful to you so far. I also recommend "Opening Up," as far as books are concerned.

Hope you'll continue to read our various threads, and post any thoughts or questions you may have.

With regards,
Kevin T.
 
Thanks Kevin! It's good to know others know what I mean about living here...it can be rough if you aren't part of the majority, for sure!

We do have our plates full, but we are all up to the challenge. It takes a lot of scheduling and planning, but we're making it work.

I'll definitely check out that book...thanks!
 
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