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Old 05-16-2011, 05:33 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,732

I have always been independent in relationships really. I had to think how I am before responding. It was a useful procedure actually. Thank you.

I got my own room too last fall. This has made a significant change in how I feel now. I don't use it much really, but its a space that I feel I can fall into, if that makes sense. I can just let go in there. My rules and my choice happens in my room. Any visitors are there as a guest and I can ask them to leave if I want. I don't have to share. Its made a huge diFference.

Other than that I go out by myself, make plans for myself, have ideas and creations I carry through on by myself. I usually invite someone along though, but that doesn't make it about a merged transaction, but about doing it as individuals together, if that makes sense.

PN meditates. I can hear him get up as we speak in the room above actually. That is good "me" time to him. Mono spends a lot of time independently from me, I think he would be far more merged with me if it were just us. One of the benefits of poly for him is that we aren't and therefore he has his independence.
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