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Old 05-25-2010, 02:00 AM
whoKnows whoKnows is offline
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 5

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Just to clarify, because the former is cool, the latter is dangerous. Your wife told you she was poly from the get-go, and if you one day decide that you're not ok with it, you can't expect her to change.
It's the former, I am open to having a poly relationship in the future, it's just not a necessity or even a want right now. I will always accept that my wife is Poly.

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
I suspect she has always looked for guys this way, not just since meeting you. You may not approve, but it's who she is and what she does. If you try to change that, then what you're saying is you don't accept her the way she is, and you want her to change who she is in order to be more compatible with you. Does that really sound fair to you?
I agree, we talked this through & I discovered it's not actually the way she goes about meeting guys, it's more about how discreet it is. We agreed new rules to allow her to continue being who she is, but doing it more discreetly.

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
How did you meet your wife in the first place? If it worked once, maybe it would work again?
We actually met in a bar, so I guess it would be hypocritical to say she can't do that anymore! As I mentioned above though we've talked this through again & made some new rules which give her the freedom she desires but also allows me to be completely comfortable with our arrangements
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