DBannister
New member
My wife Luisa and I are in a closed quad with another married couple, Scott and Lynn. All members are bisexual.
Scott and Lynn are new to polyamory (we introduced them to the concept after really hitting it off with them). Everyone seems to be doing the work, communicating clearly, learning everything we can...all good.
Except Lynn and I seem to have connected far more deeply than any other dyad in the group. Scott is trying very hard to cope with his jealousy feelings and has been great about communicating his feelings openly with all of us. Luisa has fallen for Scott pretty hard, but he hasn't developed the same feelings in return.
Currently I'm trying to help Luisa deal with her feelings of exclusion jealousy (she is upset her love isn't being returned while mine is), and not exacerbate whichever flavor of jealousy Scott is feeling. They both know their marriage is as valuable to us as our own...we even take the kids so they can have alone time.
I know Luisa and Scott are working through their feelings and committed to the group...but I still have this gnawing fear that if any part of the quad isn't working, the whole thing could fall apart and leave Lynn and me pretty broken-hearted.
Is there anything I can/should do besides loving them both and letting them have time and space to process?
Scott and Lynn are new to polyamory (we introduced them to the concept after really hitting it off with them). Everyone seems to be doing the work, communicating clearly, learning everything we can...all good.
Except Lynn and I seem to have connected far more deeply than any other dyad in the group. Scott is trying very hard to cope with his jealousy feelings and has been great about communicating his feelings openly with all of us. Luisa has fallen for Scott pretty hard, but he hasn't developed the same feelings in return.
Currently I'm trying to help Luisa deal with her feelings of exclusion jealousy (she is upset her love isn't being returned while mine is), and not exacerbate whichever flavor of jealousy Scott is feeling. They both know their marriage is as valuable to us as our own...we even take the kids so they can have alone time.
I know Luisa and Scott are working through their feelings and committed to the group...but I still have this gnawing fear that if any part of the quad isn't working, the whole thing could fall apart and leave Lynn and me pretty broken-hearted.
Is there anything I can/should do besides loving them both and letting them have time and space to process?