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Old 08-17-2010, 05:47 AM
dragonflysky dragonflysky is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 211

Originally Posted by Phisch View Post
I have always considered myself as polyamorous. I didnt realize there was such a thing, since society teaches differently, until finally delving into the notion. I am currently involved in a monogamous relationship in which I brought up the idea of polyamory fairly early. I wasn't really interested in her being with other men but felt since I wanted to be with another woman/women on occasion, it would only be fair......

...I realized that I am NOT OK with her being with another man. I have tried to be open to that possibility since I desire to be in other loving relationships openly, but I realize I will be unable to share her (*with a man)...

...So here's the question (finally) ...Is it really fair for me to try to be who I am and ask her to share me when I am not OK with her being with another man? Is this counter-intuitive to the ideas of polyamory? Do others live by these rules or feel the same way? It feels selfish of me to lay down that rule but I would rather not be with others that to share her with another man...
Is your wife bi-sexual such that she might be interested in adding a female love/lover to her life? If not......what you're wanting is called "polygyny"....not to be confused with polyamory. And personally, as a 55 year old female whose observed and been part of the struggles for women's rights, polygyny grinds me. As someone who lives in Utah, however, I won't deny that it's worked for..and been many females. And I'd certainly defend their right to make that choice as I want the right to make mine.
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