bastet
New member
I'm replaying the conversation (over and over of course) with Hubs last night.
LSL (hubs) stated that he isn't interested in dating women who don't have some kind of bisexual or at least bi-curious leaning. His fantasy is that we all get along, cuddle, hang out maybe have sex etc. I'm on board with this yet hesitant since our first foray into the poly world included this very scenario and it went down in flames leaving us licking wounds. Very long story short, we were starry eyed and full of NRE. She wanted to separate us, well mainly him. It didn't go well. Our second attempt ended similarly but with less drama. We took a break from pursuing emotional contact with other people.
Now that we are inching back toward the emotional before the physical I'm more inclined to have this be a solo venture for each of us. While the idea of sharing his girlfriends isn't off the table it's not exactly what I'm looking for.
He knows this, yet still talks about wanting to share. I feel like it's a bit of a double standard wrapped in a package that looks altruistic. If he's always "sharing" and I'm not then he can feel upset with me for wanting connections outside of ours. I don't have issue with him knowing people that are close. I'd even share if the other person was into it. Yet my 'fantasy' leans in the direction of individual connections not necessarily group.
I'd be interested in people's experience with this if any or advice.
LSL (hubs) stated that he isn't interested in dating women who don't have some kind of bisexual or at least bi-curious leaning. His fantasy is that we all get along, cuddle, hang out maybe have sex etc. I'm on board with this yet hesitant since our first foray into the poly world included this very scenario and it went down in flames leaving us licking wounds. Very long story short, we were starry eyed and full of NRE. She wanted to separate us, well mainly him. It didn't go well. Our second attempt ended similarly but with less drama. We took a break from pursuing emotional contact with other people.
Now that we are inching back toward the emotional before the physical I'm more inclined to have this be a solo venture for each of us. While the idea of sharing his girlfriends isn't off the table it's not exactly what I'm looking for.
He knows this, yet still talks about wanting to share. I feel like it's a bit of a double standard wrapped in a package that looks altruistic. If he's always "sharing" and I'm not then he can feel upset with me for wanting connections outside of ours. I don't have issue with him knowing people that are close. I'd even share if the other person was into it. Yet my 'fantasy' leans in the direction of individual connections not necessarily group.
I'd be interested in people's experience with this if any or advice.