Looking for Interviews with Polyamorous Women

I have no clue why my Gay friends find it offensive. Honestly, I feel it is out of respect for what they are comfortable with. Perhaps instead of making generalizations for my being PC with my friends I shouldn't speak for a community I am not a member of.

As for me the reason I am senstive about such things is I was just told I was a cheating slut whore,by someone who doesn't know me, but emailed me to let me know. Wanted to have a fling with me and I wasn't attracted to him or his morals He thinks me being poly, is an open invitation. When he is the one hiding his relationships from his wife. So perhaps right now I am a little senstive to labels.
 
I have no clue why my Gay friends find it offensive. Honestly, I feel it is out of respect for what they are comfortable with. Perhaps instead of making generalizations for my being PC with my friends I shouldn't speak for a community I am not a member of.

As for me the reason I am sensitive about such things is I was just told I was a cheating slut whore,by someone who doesn't know me, but emailed me to let me know. Wanted to have a fling with me and I wasn't attracted to him or his morals He thinks me being poly, is an open invitation. When he is the one hiding his relationships from his wife. So perhaps right now I am a little sensitive to labels.

Ah, that sucks! I would just love to write these people back sometimes. Grrr! What did you say back?

As for the friends? I guess you are in an interesting position to find out! I'd love to know why!
 
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I have no clue why my Gay friends find it offensive. Honestly, I feel it is out of respect for what they are comfortable with. Perhaps instead of making generalizations for my being PC with my friends I shouldn't speak for a community I am not a member of.

Or - here's a radical thought - you could ASK THEM why they find the q-word offensive. For all the "communication" skill that's supposed to be required of functional polyamorous people, it should be a walk in the park to ask your friend(s) a question like this.
 
I sent you an email. I don't mind answering some questions. Cause of the nature of my business my emails tend to go to spam so I wanted to be sure to let you know to check there! Good luck with your thesis. (I didn't read to the end to see if you found enough so this may be fruitless :)
 
I have no problems asking my dearest friend and extended friends why they feel this way. My best friend, was was his partner is the person who let me know this wasn't acceptable. He actually died of Aids years ago. I do know that he was taunted in small southern town by the word queer, more then fag or anything else. So that was his reason. We traveled extensively for business often staying as long as 3 months or more so we were very close. As for my dearest friend, I will ask him. When I go home (hometown home I will ask him and extended friends) they have a huge party christmas night and I am often with my husband the only straight people there. So I can ask then as well.

As for this ass who called me these names, he thinks polyamory means multiple relationships without feelings. He is a Dom, who previously told me he was into public humilation or private humilation. So I chose to ignore him instead of playing his game. Actually I was offended, however I also know it is his issue and not mine.
 
Hey guys, may I respectfully request an end to the hijack?

Swheeler, I would be very interested in your research. I am not a candidate to participate, but would nevertheless be very interested in learning more about it, as well as the other studies done on other subsets of the community. Where can we find this research?
 
I live in Canada, but my boyfriend is American (actually from California, too!) and I'm in the correct age range. I guess I don't fit the criteria? That's too bad, as I'd love to take part in a study...
This being said, I have social phobias so phone and in person would both be a problem, I'm more of a forum/email/IM person.
 
Why do I find the word queer offensive. I know it is because my gay friends find it offensive. I have no clue why. They do, and since that is their culture I respect what they say.

As a queer man (and a bisexual man--or, better, biamorous man) I'm slightly (though lovingly) annoyed by those flaming faggots (i.e., 'gays') who haven't got the balls to embrace the very pragmatic term: queer. I have adopted the term "queer" in large part because I'm not -- strictly speaking -- "gay" [only attracted to same sex people] (even though I've been more-or-less married to two men, the first for 6 and the second for 14 years). And I don't fit much in mainstream or mainline (or even steriotypical "gay culture". And there are other reasons, too.

Gay is a rather exclusive term while queer is much more inclusive.
 
As a queer man (and a bisexual man--or, better, biamorous man) I'm slightly (though lovingly) annoyed by those flaming faggots (i.e., 'gays') ...

Gosh.
 
Hi everyone! My apologies for not replying sooner--this week got rather hectic for me, and I fell behind on this thread.

First, thanks to everyone that's e-mailed me so far! I am still looking for additional candidates, so don't hesitate to contact me if you're still interested.

I'll try to cover a few different replies at once:

- I'd be happy to post my results here when I'm done. That won't be until May 2011, but I'm more than willing to share what I find out with the community.

- I don't want to reiterate what other posters have said, but just to clarify, I use the word "queer" as an umbrella term for all "alternative" sexualities. That being said, many people (including myself) also now use the word "queer" as a way of identifying their sexual orientation when it doesn't neatly fit into the hetero/homo/bi categories. Even though we've tried to reclaim it as a positive word, however, many LGBT people (especially those who lived through the initial AIDS crisis) still object to its use and associate it with its history as a slur.

- For those of you interested in reading more academic research on polyamory: there are several researchers who are focusing on polyamory right now, and whose work has been very helpful to me as I prepared for my own research. I highly recommend Meg Barker and Darren Landridge's Understanding Non-Monogamies--it's an expensive book (so you may want to see if you can get it from a local library), but it addresses the widest range of the poly community I've seen yet, and contains some very thought-provoking essays. I also recommend looking up articles by Elisabeth Sheff, Meg Barker, or Ani Ritchie (maybe through Google Scholar, or your local university's journal databases). There was also an issue of the academic journal Sexualities from 2006 that focused solely on poly issues; again, your local university might have a copy or online access to it. Hope that helps a bit!

I think that hits the major points, but if I overlooked someone's comment/question, please let me know and I'll be happy to answer.
 
Great. Thanks for the info, swheeler. This will be a good opportunity to make use of my local library's Inter-Library Loan program, since I'm SURE they won't have any of this research available directly.
 
I passed the request along among some local peeps who fit the criteria for participation. I can't say that any of them will step up, though I suspect at least one of them will.
 
I just havent heard the term flaming faggot in a long long time. Took me aback, even if you are one!
 
Ironic humor, and stuff like that. Don't mean nothing bad by it!
 
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