AnnabelMore
Active member
Is this something that happens much? Have you ever had a crush, that wasn't returned, on your lover's lover? Or had your partner's parter tell you they loved you when you didn't feel the same way?
Hey! Sounds like you're in love. Questions coming. You mix past and present tenses here [you'll love French verbs!]: "I had a crush", "I can't say she didn't also have a crush", "I adore her". So, has she still (maybe) got a crush on you? Do you still have a crush on her? Is bi a possibility for both of you? Is there a really big deal about "certainly not the same way/depth/level"? Wouldn't this (maybe) work itself out (level out / reach dizzy heights together) if you were to get involved romantically and/or sexually? Or would that REALLY drive Maca over the edge?//I had a crush on Maca's gf. I can't say she didn't also have a crush on me possibly, but certainly not the same way/depth/level.
I adore her, she's a doll. But, I have to limit my time around them, because I get jealous of the attention she gives him... I know-fucking assbackwards. I just wish...
She's a sweetheart, treats me with love, respect, honor. I absolutely fell for her when she wrote in a note to me "thank you for sharing your M with me." It seems silly even to me, when I repeat it. But when she wrote that and I read it-it just drove straight into my heart. It was such a metamouristic thing to say (yes I made that word up) and I thought OMG she's SO amazing!
She's intelligent, beautiful, sexy, fun, sincere, caring, considerate, patient, accepting...
I could go on and on and on....
I watch a lot of Asian cinema & Unrequited love is a common theme there, I always loved those stories SO MUCH, until I felt it myself...
"If only..." the 2 saddest words in any language...
Emotional rejection actually does cause pain, as a recent study found: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2011/03/110328-romantic-rejection-pain-brain-scans-mri-health-science/
When Wendigo and I first got together, I was terrified of Pretty Lady. Now I love her and know that she doesn't love me the same way.... oh, she's definitely physically attracted to me, but she's doesn't believe she's poly so she won't let her feelings go beyond a crush and a friends with benefits situation. Since that means I get to keep her in my life, I'm okay with that, but it does sting a little sometimes.
Since that means I get to keep her in my life, I'm okay with that, but it does sting a little sometimes.
I has never happened to me, as I'm straight and have only been involved with straight guys so far, but I imagine it would be a pretty tricky situation.
I hope there is no bias against triads. They can and do occur... they can be successful. I make an attempt to let that be known personally. The fact is that they more than often don't and therefore it can be dangerous to set oneself up to assume that they are the only option for a poly dynamic. It seems that quite often triads are seen as poly utopia for a couple. This is as not as fantastical as finding a proper unicorn, but almost as close. At least that is what has been witnessed here. As you say though, it could be that there is no time for them to be here when they are just livin' it.This forum might even bias one a bit against triads, because a lot of people come here seeking for advice. All those happy triad success stories might just go undetected because they never join forums like these.
this andit seems to happen more often that people will expect a triad.
this and the individuality bit... it doesn't make me pessimistic, but does make me cringe... mostly because I don't like to see people set themselves up and quite often they do with the whole triad/unicorn thing... they seem to get all giddy over it as if it will answer all their problems and make their lives peeeeerfect and it just mostly doesn't.it just seems to me like one way to cling on to coupledom while practicing poly, in a 'best of both worlds' type of solution.
Be careful, feelings can & Do change.