Is this correct? You met Feedhercandy here on this board, and you and your wife are in a quad arrangement with another couple, M and T2? This second scenario is something so many polys seem to want, and so seldom find.
Sorry about your friend's violent end.
I met T2 through her husband M, I met FHC when she contacted me through our local poly group. She and her husband have become friends T and I love to hang out with. very very cool people.
The quad dynamic requires that I be aware of 11 different relationships just within the quad itself at any given time. No wonder I have zero time for backsliding.
My measure of what makes my time with FHC and T2 into a relationship as opposed to dating, is the level of Intimacy. A deep level of intimacy can be created in a short period of time, if both parties agree to do so. I was fortunate that T2 and FHC were honest and courageous.
When I talk of intimacy I'm not referring to sex, (although that's a lot of fun) but of spiritual, emotional and intellectual intimacy. Scary stuff when you jump into it like I did, but worth it.
Don't stop.
Don't slow down.
Never back up.
Always forward.
Been an interesting 96-97 days.
And thanks for the thought about my friend.
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