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Old 11-09-2010, 07:02 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
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Default Burlesque.

So I finally got my moment on stage. I must say it is addicting, but I am not off to rush out and do it again...

I went to meet all the women to do our make up and get ready... fun fun fun hanging out with half naked women with lots of hair spray, fake eyelashes, tons of foundation, red lips and a whole lot of sequins and feathers flying of boas for an afternoon.

I find in these situations with women that I quite often get ignored or shuffled to the side... I usually just stay quiet. I am not like other women. I talk loudly, am very direct, don't cluck like a hen and although they find me funny I can either be too crass and blunt or come off as too ... well... British somehow... what ever that means. So I allow myself to just go into my head and am quite happy there.

There was a woman that had no idea what foundation was let alone why she should wear it... she did a number where she striped her welding gear. HOT! But she needed a lot of attention before the show as she was high maintenance needy. All in a good way, she just didn't have a clue... she was awesome with my body rhinestones... we got on well.

There were some directions from the woman that was putting the show on on how to do hair, stage make up... etc. but other than that we were pretty much on our own. I can't believe how long it takes to look the part! All afternoon. when I was done I caught myself in the mirror and saw my grandmother. I freaked a bit as although she was a handsome woman, I looked old... to me anyways.

When we got there I was the first there... all the old regular gay men behind the bar watched with fascination as I came in with a white boa and a hot pink cocktail dress in full make up and curly red ringlet locks... I wondered if they thought I was a drag queen.

The others arrived and we set up camp behind the stage... I am a very organized person and found myself a little spot where I lay everything out and made sure my pasties were ready to go... others did their thing... everything from throwing stuff around and spreading out EVERYWHERE, to just standing there with their one bag.... so interesting to watch women under pressure and nervous.

When the show began I was second in the second set, so I sat with PN, Mono, Derby, her husband and girlfriend, and at least 10 members/friends of the poly community here, including a friend from the women's group I run that identifies as a swinger. There was a co-worker too and another that couldn't get in... because we were SOLD OUT! 170 people packed into this hot, no air bar.

PN, Mono and Derby brought me flowers... I was the only one with flowers. such a lucky lady aren't I?... I tried to down play it with the others as they were more than a little confused that I had three people bringing me flowers. I also got a lovely shaken, dirty, wet, gin martini from Derby after show... again more smiles. I was really interested in myself in that I didn't drink before hand. I love to drink and love a good party of drinking and laughing, but I was completely sober for this. I wanted that for some reason... I think it would of lost meaning if I had had even one drink.

The show was MCed by this crazy lesbian who is crass and hilarious. It really made for a funny night... one after another everyone did their thing... and very well too. I had to follow the woman running the show, who is fantastic and really skilled.. I wasn't entirely happy about that, but I went out behind my red curtain carried by the pick up girls and got myself ready...

All tied up with purple ribbon, I did a little mild BDSM number The crowd was really loud but I barely heard them. I just smiled smiled smiled and went through my well oiled routine with no fear at all. I felt completely confident and enjoyed myself completely... it was a total gift to be able to entertain people I know and everyone else too. I looked out over the sea of faces and saw people smiling back in amusement, respect, joy and for that moment no one was unhappy... I had made them feel happiness and joy and that was my perfect moment. That was all I really wanted for them... the rest was for me.

What I got out of it was a moment of cathartic release from a long journey with sexual boundary issues. The song I did and the tying myself up indicated a statement about removing those bounds that I had been tied into by myself and others and being free again. At the end I bounced my tits and twirled my tassels with all my mite and grinned from ear to ear with the pleasure of knowing that that was where I am at in terms for giving myself to strangers again. Next time I do it, I will give more as I didn't fully get down to the bare bones... but it was just right for the first time.
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