Rings

mellsey

New member
Hello,
my poly family are looking for "wedding" commitment rings. Does anyone have any idea or a design that would fit our poly life. Being two couples we already have one set of rings, but would like to replace them with one for all four of us that symbolizes our connection and commitments.
 
Mellsey, are you planning a commitment ceremony? Do you feel that this would be on the level of a group marriage? I've considered a group marriage, but I'm a little afraid I'd be jumping into it too quickly. Would you be replacing your wedding rings altogether?

Honestly, I like the idea of a claddagh--two hands holding a heart seems to sum it all up for me. If you're looking to have something made, perhaps you could all discuss symbols that you feel embody what makes the relationship special, or represent each of you.
 
We've lately been discussing this topic in our V....our recently divorced friend is thinking of having her old engagement/wedding rings broken down and having 3 rings made with all the diamonds dispersed among the three new rings so we all have a part of her. Very thoughtful of her to want to do that. I suspect my wife and I will still wear our modest wedding bands too but we haven't discussed that yet. Of course, we all 3 could just take the easy way out and order 3 distinctly matching bands that should signify to all that we are together. That would be fun to watch at parties as people put 2 and 2 together!

What kind of ceremony to do? Don't know what's legal or if we even want to do anything legal but surely a commitment ceremony of some sort is in the offing.
 
We have always leaned to Celtic Jewelry in our Handfasting ceremonies.

KnotRing.gif

KnotRing02.gif

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Do a Google search or here's a online store I like to visit.

http://www.moonstone-jewelry.com/index.html

Just Me,
Tim
 
Mellsey, are you planning a commitment ceremony? Do you feel that this would be on the level of a group marriage? I've considered a group marriage, but I'm a little afraid I'd be jumping into it too quickly. Would you be replacing your wedding rings altogether?

Honestly, I like the idea of a claddagh--two hands holding a heart seems to sum it all up for me. If you're looking to have something made, perhaps you could all discuss symbols that you feel embody what makes the relationship special, or represent each of you.

We really have not talked about what type of ceremony we will do, but yes it would be a group marriage and yes it would replace our mono wedding rings. That is one thing all four of us have agreed upon. When and what we will do is still undesided. I have been looking at the celtic rings and the infinity knot is pretty cool looking.
 
We've lately been discussing this topic in our V....our recently divorced friend is thinking of having her old engagement/wedding rings broken down and having 3 rings made with all the diamonds dispersed among the three new rings so we all have a part of her. Very thoughtful of her to want to do that. I suspect my wife and I will still wear our modest wedding bands too but we haven't discussed that yet. Of course, we all 3 could just take the easy way out and order 3 distinctly matching bands that should signify to all that we are together. That would be fun to watch at parties as people put 2 and 2 together!

What kind of ceremony to do? Don't know what's legal or if we even want to do anything legal but surely a commitment ceremony of some sort is in the offing.

Mark1npt,
We are leaning more towards the distinctly matching bands that represent polyamory and our love for one another.

We have not discussed the ceremony yet, it will just be a private commitment ceremony. I know we can not do anything legal, which is not fair, but is life.
 
Tim,
Thank you, I have just looked at that website. It does have some beautiful pieces.
Mellsey
 
I found the perfect thing for your quad here!

decoderrings2.jpg


Sorry, yes I know...look how funny he thinks he is....I just couldn't resist. (And I've never personally understood some people's inclination to having matching rings/dogs/tatoo's etc....but whatever...that's my problem, not yours)

In all seriousness, something like these interlocking types might be an option as well, with a kind of subtle symbolism...particularly if you get the sets custom made to your particular tastes. Maybe a 3 part ring, with the names of each other partner on each link for example.

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Good luck in your search. Hopefully there's a local whitesmith or two that can help you realize your vision. (If there's a blacksmith guild in your area, there's a slight possibility they might know some)

Cheers.
 
I heard of a poly group getting rings where each type of stone represented a person in the group. (Maybe it was by birthstone?) So they all got rings that had those stones in it somewhere.
 
Congrats Mell!! The wives and I are actually going to have a commitment ceremony as well in 2013. We needed to wait that long as that's the next time that my wedding anniversary rolls around. That marks 10 years that my wife and I will be married so we're going to renew our vows, then bring our gf in and have a commitment ceremony with her so that she can be a part of our day.

We've also talked about what we would do for rings so thank you for starting this thread! There are a lot of great ideas on here. Good luck and congrats again!
 
I've always liked claddaghs, as well. Hope you find something that works, and congratulations! :)


I personally don't like rings. I recently pulled mine and my partner's off our fingers because they were hurting me when we held hands and I was sick of that. And apparently fingers change size- so the randomness of whether or not the ring would fit was bugging me, too. We'd been thinking about trying to find a better alternative already, because neither of us were happy with how the rings were working out.
So, we're looking for alternatives for that.
 
We're all getting matching tattoos as well. Maybe you get tattoos of rings? Food for though.
 
I read this thread to the rest of my triad and we were thinking about have rings specially made out of Tungsten (as that is the only ring hubby will wear to work) with three trillium cut stones. Each stone is one of our birthstones. So it will be a ring completely dripping with symbolism for us. The trillium cut because we are a triad. The birthstones are straight forward, each one representing each of us and the ring is our commitment to our relationship to each other. I drew a very sad picture of it but you'll get the idea.

Tungsten is even better than platinum as it is completely scratch resistant and harder to break. You just have to be sized properly to get it made for you correctly.
 

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Here's a real ring like the one I tried to draw. :p
I like that ring, we have discussed the Claddagh with a stone. one color for my primary and his secondary and a different color for me and my secondary. Just have not found the right ones yet, still looking.
 
Hey there and Congratulations!!! When my husband and I found a woman we wanted to include into our family and decided to ask her to join us as a sister wife we did the ring search as well. We couldn't decide on one simple design so after a search at different jewelry stores and almost giving up we were in Wal-Mart one day and found what we thought was the perfect ring....a titanium ring that says Always and Forever on the outside in a very intricate pattern. We thought that about summed up our feelings for each other as well as the woman we had chosen to become a part of us. I know, it is a Wal-Mart ring :rolleyes: but it honestly summed up all our feelings so we chose it!! Just a suggestion, sometimes we find what we are looking for in the most unlikely of places.
 
The engagement ring my husband bought for me was purchased online. It cost 20 bucks. But it has a triskele pattern and a moonstone in the center which is what I really wanted (never been into big diamonds or that such). It is not the price tag that makes it special, it's the sentiment behind it.
 
I'd be interested to know (and sorry, this is a little off topic...) how long people have been together before considering marriage or any kind of symbology such as a ring to connect you... ?

Mono is much more of a "lets do it now" type whereas I need everyone to feel comfortable.... I have a lot of concern for those in my life being fully aware that I am serious and making a commitment from a place of certainty that only comes from having lived life together for a time. When I got married to my husband we did it the same way. Our ceremony was far from traditional and we wrote our own contract (which included many aspects of our poly nature I might add!). We didn't get married legally on our day.... we actually secretly married a couple of months before at someones house after work one day. We invited a couple of friends to witness as they got off work at the same time. It was more like the inconvenience of taking our taxes to an accountant than anything else. Anyway, I would be surprised if it was much different with Mono.... the ceremony is about the love, bonding and commitment more than the legality in my mind and under these kind of circumstances and I am so glad that I might get to do it like that again. Skip the taking the tax stuff to an accountant part...

Just to stay on topic....I have started wearing my wedding band on my other hand since meeting mono... practically, because I lost 30 lbs this year and it doesn't fit my less dominate hand any more. I realize however that this is also an interesting circumstance.

I think I would want to wear what I pick and mono could wear whatever he picks. He already has a tattooed wedding band on his finger that he had some writing added too recently to respectfully mark the end of his marriage, but he has said that he would add more to signify our love when the time comes. He has already tattooed himself with a sleeve on his left arm of intertwined trees, sky and and our sun sign symbols merged together.... he can tell more if he wants on what that means to him.....
 
We have spoken about getting a Tattoo.. No final decission on the design yet. But it has been discussed. I wear my wedding rings as normal, because that commitment hasnt changed. I like the idea of a right hand ring too.
 
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