SchrodingersCat
Active member
Dammit, why doesn't this forum have a "like" button??
Agani, I so sorry. I should have never said that about maturity. It was flip and I am sorry.
I cannot compare though someone saying an abled person is healthy (in comparison to a disabled person). The word "healthy' for me means not just a personal opinion, but it key in understanding why people with disabilities have a 70% unemployment rate and many cam mot get in to a grocery store because of architecture.
Would you consider homophobia and racism akin to my STUPID comment of maturity? I wonder for example, this is a very openminded ,loving forum, but how many here have/or would date someone with a disability, or employ them, or don't use the word lame or retarded or spastic on a regular basis? How many live in towns that 100 % wheelchair accesinle (or have even thought about that)? How many teachers here use disability as part of their multicural curriculum.
I hope you guys don't kick me off! I am old (42) and not good with internet forums I am just trying to get my point across. Do you really think my marginalization of people who I call immature is a fair comparison to ableist??
Calling someone immature for living alone with no kids or pets amounts to judging her by the standards you've set for your own life. "She's not like me, so she's immature."
For that matter, there are plenty of 16 year old parents who live with the father of their baby and two dogs. I would hardly call that a criteria for maturity.
I wonder for example, this is a very openminded ,loving forum, but how many here have/or would date someone with a disability, or employ them, or don't use the word lame or retarded or spastic on a regular basis?
Would you consider homophobia and racism akin to my STUPID comment of maturity?
I wonder for example, how many here have/or would date someone with a disability, or employ them, or don't use the word lame or retarded or spastic on a regular basis? How many live in towns that 100 % wheelchair accesinle (or have even thought about that)? How many teachers here use disability as part of their multicural curriculum.
Do you really think my marginalization of people who I call immature is a fair comparison to ableist??
I just want to say many of these things I have asked concretely for. Some have been resolved through his own agency. Other's resolved by him moving into his own room. Other by me being less controlling.
My husband doesn't not plan things for me. I would like him to actively plan things to do with both my son and I together or separately. Less him waiting for me to plan, suggest things and make sure they are carried out.
He is the kind of person who says I have to work on Saturday (on Friday night). I would like to have full details of what is going on three-five days in advance if the event includes me taking over his work (cooking dinner and keeping our son at night.) Not assuming I'm willing to just cover childcare.
He doesn't pick up after himself. I would like more cleaning when he cooks so every dish isn't in the sink and papers all over the counter which he leaves when he is done.
He forgets events (and does not tell me with enough notice what his work is). Somehow, however he plans his dates with GF a week in advance. He is extremely respectful of her schedule. This makes in LIVID. I would like more of being attended to his/mine/own calendar.
I work at home so I can do most the housework, but it would be great to have someone to say "O that door in stuck, let me fix it!" Or o the lightbulb is out, let me fix it.
Agani, I so sorry. I should have never said that about maturity. It was flip and I am sorry.
I hope you guys don't kick me off! I am old (42) and not good with internet forums I am just trying to get my point across. Do you really think my marginalization of people who I call immature is a fair comparison to ableist??
I only quoted what I was going to reply to.I want to ask Vix (who I greatly admire) how do you fight for a political group without it sounding like you are making it into us and them? How can I speak out against ableism with sounding like it's a personal offense?
Gala Girl - your advice helped me so much. If you are not a counselor you should be!!
1. My comment about immaturity was not well put and unfair. I was talking specifically about one person, my husband's girlfriend, and my reservations with her.
5. Sex parities don't even bother me. I just don't want the in MY life.
Please try to engage what I'm actually saying.