Originally Posted by dingedheart
.... Getting in the trench and crawling in the emotional muck and coming out with your marriage Intact and happy makes you poly.
On the other hand, some people haven't any, or much, "emotional muck" to "crawl" through by now--at least not "emotional muck" about opening to loving others. Not everyone will experience poly as anguished and tormenting and ....
But some will.
I don't mean to disparage those who will experience anguish and torment in such a journey, by the way. I just wanted to point out that it needn't be so--for some.