I have wanted to start a personal thread for a while but didn’t know where to begin… I have so much to say but don’t know what to say. Anyway…. I thought I would start with my current relationship status.
I have been with Jonny since I was 20. We’ve been together for 11 years and married for 8. The majority of that time we have been monogamous. Except the whole time I have been with him there have been other people that I have loved and wanted to be with. This was a source of shame and self-hatred for me because I couldn’t understand how I could develop intense feelings for people other than my husband, because that is not how it is “supposed to be”. We decided to try something new, which I guess would be a “poly marriage” so that I could explore/express my feelings for other people…. Women in particular.
I’ve been in love with M for a few years now and have kept my feelings for her to myself until earlier this year. We have decided to keep our relationship non-sexual because of our differing ideas of “what we are looking for”. I don’t really know what to call us or how to define our relationship. Just like my Jonny, she’s my family and my home.
I recently went out with a girl I know who I have had strong feelings for for quite some time. It didn’t work out, and I’m still a bit sad about that.
I suppose that’s all I have to say right now