Still working my way through the ginormous Primary/Secondary thread in the Gen section. Interesting thought on the issue of a new person getting involved with people in an existing relationship from CielDuMatin:
"While I don't feel that it is to be avoided whenever possible, I think it's like buying a used car - you need to look at things very very carefully, and with a skeptical eye to make sure that everything is as it truly seems."
I bought a used Chevy pretty quickly several years ago and it caused me regular problems that were really annoying. I was much slower in picking out my next car, a used Honda, which has served me extraordinarily well for the last two years. Gotta be picky.