I've just had a very rough patch. Let us just say that this guy I had thought was a friend has treated me -- repeatedly -- with extraordinary unkindness and insensitivity. That would be the one I called "long lost love". We went to a queer men's gathering together. I won't tell the details here, but I will welcome kind and loving / comforting words. I'll recover. The emotional pain was so severe that I had physical pain because of it. And, no, I was not hoping for "romance" with him. I was hoping for a human connection, some warmth, some tender presence.... Overall, I got none of that. Indeed, he kept brushing me off for More Important Things/Persons, and to an extreme. Long story I shall not tell here.
At least I'm making lemonade from all of these lemons! And this all helped me to appreciate the people in my life who really are true friends and loves--especially Kevin and "FarawaySweetie" -- whom I just spent time with on the phone. She's such a joy!