I got similar coping skills; just like you I can manipulate what I dream about and I tend to worry too much. When all the confusion about poly was fresh I didn't sleep much because I was so scared what the reaction of my husband could be and I experienced every possible kind in my dreams night per night. I still tend to worry too much and cause problems with this.
I searched this side to find stories about people in a similar situation to mine and some of them weren't promising and cause me to worry even more. Sometimes I need to remind myself that every situation is unique and that I shouldn't worry this much. But it really helps to 'feel prepared'. When I read about all the pitfalls and other issues to look out for I kind of mark it off and say to myself "OK, keep that in mind if there ever is a sign of a situation like that aproaching."
So keep on with your search, I know it helps, but bear in mind not to live your dreams too vividly imagining the saddest stories you will hear. It may be too much stressing about a thing that will never apply to you.
Wishing you all the best.
Facts: 30, female, bi, v-type relationship with Sward (husband, straight, mono) and Lin (boyfriend, straight, mono), poly-fi and co-primary.