Sounds a lot like what we went through at the beginning. And I still struggle with the pain I am putting my husband through. Am I asking too much of him, to accept this? Would he be better off if I just left?
Well -- if I wanted to leave, I would. If he wants to, he will.
There's an awesome scene in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, right after Butch has taken Etta (Sundance's "wife") on a romantic bikeride. I'm not quoting exactly, but it's kinda like this:
Sundance: What the hell are you doing?
Butch: I'm stealin' your woman.
Sundance (thinks a minute, scratches his ass, and shrugs): Take her.
Such cocky confidence! From both of them! (I love my cowboys
). Etta's not going anywhere. Why should she??? She's got her cake and eating it too. And her cowboys know it! Queen Bee is a great place to be
. You have given your wife this elevated status, that she is worthy of all the love she desires. I know I was floating around like a goddess, especially at the beginning.
NRE is kind of a cloud. When you poof it out of the way for a minute, you find that underneath it all the love is still there, and you are more solid in your marriage than you think. It sounds to me like you two are starting out from a good place. Keep up the good communication. And don't forget to laugh and lighten up. It helps.