Thanks for the support everyone. Obviously its very hard to leave this woman that I love very much. I'm not sure if Poly is for me but there is at least glimmer of hope that i can do this and we can stay together.
We talked a lot last night and she clarified that it was no threat to leave. She was actually trying to leave me because she didn't think I can deal with this. Maybe she is right. I did also tell her some of my needs. The main thing is that if she wants me to be her primary, then I need to be #1 priority. This week, I'm feeling like her last priority and she keeps explaining how seeking poly is because I neglected her and said this and said that. I downloaded the jealously workbook thing from Allstar's link but could bring myself to start it.
Right now I'm just feeling like she has made this life changing decision without me and left me in the dust so she can chase her own desires. Man this sucks.