Originally Posted by redpepper
I am getting the church analogy. It helps me step out side of the discussion and see it from the outside actually as I am not religious. Very helpful, thanls for that. The neighbor analogy is helpful for me also.
So, non-monogamy is more the umbrella term than poly then? Sometimes I hear that polyamory is an umbrella term for anything between swinging and poly fi. It seems that poly is more on the latter end maybe and all of it ia non-monogamy.
Ding, ding, ding,.... yep to all.
For my own personal interpretation, poly has to mean more then 'loves in multiples' otherwise, pretty much anyone is poly. You could be monogamous, and still carry a torch for a old flame, and,..bam, you`re poly.
To me, it means being committed to working on loving relationships in multiples. There is a lot of work, and a process, no matter how you go about it, or what your personal belief, on those processes are.
To me, 'Open' means you are literally open to a wide variety of non-mongamous scenarios. This could include a 'mix' of dating, caring, sex, LTR, with all, or some people that come into your life.
That is where I place myself.
I think a lot of misunderstanding is definitely due to the process of learning about ones' self. When you come into any non-monogamy, there is a thinking process that pretty much puts people into one of two camps.
Are you a Swinger, or are you Poly ?
The longer you are in this, the more you see all the variables in between the two ends of a spectrum. Its a matter of going through experience, and learning about ones' self.
I think we need to remind ourselves, when we hear others use a term differently then us, that they are probably at a different process point, and that is how their definition is based.
AKA,..ask them 5 years from now, the same thing.