Redpepper, Thank you so much for that reply. Honestly, the fact that it wasn't about the original post is absolutely wonderful. I have been watching a seminar tonight on marriage by a man named Mark Gungor about marriage and how the differences between how men and women think has a lot to do with many things that cause strife in both our lives and relationships. He is a minister but his seminars are in no way "preachy" and "religious" they are actually hilarious!! Here is a link to the channel that I found them on (I actually found them through my BFF but that is where they all are) I suggest watching the first one entitled "A Tale of 2 brains.1" and if you find the next number there is the entire seminar. http://www.youtube.com/user/jamcabz#p/u/16/LiFsFwY3uG8
I appreciate it not being about the original post because honestly, she is the past. And yes, we do have a lot of hurt feelings as ANYONE would. You are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT that relationships (especially those that are online) take a lot of time to develop. Of course, if we were talking face to face these details would have been discussed, but honestly, although it seems like I type a lot, I have neuropathy in my hands, so I sometimes leave out things that may be pertinent but I dont think they really are to that SPECIFIC issue out. You would have interrupted (politely of course
) and asked questions about things that were not clear to you.
As a psychology student and honestly to be truthful, being diagnosed Bipolar at age 14, and being very intelligent, I have been studying psychology since then pretty much, I know that I need to cut ties with my therapist. I know that I give him WAY too much power then he should have in my life and mind because when I started seeing him 10 years ago I needed a therapist with that much power. I was agoraphobic, I had numerous psych admissions a year, for sometimes 6-8 weeks at a time. I was on 11 psych meds at the same time. I didn't go to school, I didn't go to lunch with friends, I didn't go anywhere. My husband picked up what we needed from wal mart on his way home from work every day. He left o work every night not knowing if I was going to be suicidal and possibly hurt myself because he wasn't there to stop me. That is a HUGE fear to have in your mind while you are trying to work and be a provider for a woman who isnt being much of a wife, shit isn't being much of a person, was pretty much a zombie.
I dont know why I am sharing this, I mean this is pretty umm deep stuff, but your post touched me, and I kinda got on a tangent. Anyway, 6 years ago I went off all the meds I have ever taken. I haven't taken any psych meds for the last 6 years. I have scoliosis of the spine and have some pretty severe mobility issues. I got a service dog for mobility, and she ended up being a Psychiatric Service dog in many ways. I enrolled in college. I had always wanted to go, and had gone after high school, but was at that time on psych meds and had to drop classes due to hospitalizations. My SD went with me to my first day of college (which was definitely a "trial run" as I had a fear of school) and my first day was AWESOME!! I decided then and there that I would dedicate myself to positivity and good things.
I have come a long way, and I write this so that you know more about where I have been, but also so that you know more about where I want to be. I am the head of a nonprofit that serves the Cancer community. My goal is to someday have a cancer center where support group meetings are held. A place where I can use my education in psychology and my own experience with cancer to help others battling. Of course with any project the size of that, it takes baby steps, and working the non profit in a pace that allows me to do school and get that degree I need to further that goal, I do the best that I can with what I have and know how to do.
Thank you for your post. It was very touching. And I will stick around. I don't know about DaJoshy, but I know that he will make the choice that is best for him.