NRE from the other side
I`ve been fortunate that in my first 2.5 years as a `born`poly (meaning i`m new to this), my relationships with both R and D (and also T) have been pretty much smooth sailing... real poly relationships with real poly`s..... heaven.
But recently I`ve had to deal with NRE from the other side.... R has now a new interest... close to her.. and being with her for my summer vacation, I could feel it between the two of them, there... tangible.... solid.
And on my side, i`ve been kind of pursuing a new interest as well... C. but it seems i wasn`t her style... wanted me to be just friend and then she fell for someone in British Columbia during a visit.... felt hard.
So i`m now reflecting on NRE and how i`m dealing with it... I am very happy for for both R and C , but i have this dark feeling i can`t shake, and i`m wondering what it is.... no i`m not jealous...
Point in case: during my vacation and visit with R, her new BF called her and she was spending a lot of time texting him, I finally had to almost physically push her out the door to go see him.... he needed her and i was not going anywhere, anyhow... things got settled and she came back.
R even told me she found me ... odd, but in a good way as i seem to have no jealousy bones in me. lol i can only hope she`s right...
Is this the sense of loss felt when we see a love one going into NRE without us? I know I`ll see R during the Holidays, plans are made, e-mail are already discussing it and i feel wonderful knowing she`ll be in my arms...again.
But does this feeling go away, this dark cloud over my heart?
Any comments will be welcomed...