Difficult spot, mate. I have been there and it is very tough. By describing your wife as "very monogamous" I guess you mean that she is very against you being anything other than strictly monogamous, and not just her own choices (as in the case of member MonoVCPHG whom I gather is personally mono but whose partner is not?)
Often he had been often bound with fetters and chains, and the chains had been rent asunder by him, and the fetters broken in pieces: neither could any man tame him...and he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered, saying, My name is Legion: for we are many.