Thread: My Dilemma
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Old 08-15-2011, 09:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tinyblu View Post
. . . he simply doesn't WANT to spend that kind of time with her. So, he cancelled the trip and then asked ME to break the news to her!!!

Here are my issues: Where's his spine? HE's the one who got her all excited about going (as was I) and now I have to be the bad guy. I have no idea how I am going to do this. She is gonna be crushed!!!
Tell him you won't do his dirty work for him. What is there to debate about? I don't understand. He's always telling you this stuff he wants you to do, that you don't want to, and you think you have to, then you waffle, and want to know what to do. You'll probably give in and do it, I bet, but why? I'll turn the tables: where is your spine?
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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