Yesterday we spent the day together at a Scottish festival ..
Throughout the day I think I handled everything ok. I tried to stay true to my self and khas and bev, I had many moments of jealousy envy and insecurity and stepped away to look at other merchants while I got myself under control.
I have no desire to inflict my vitriol on either of them.
And no I wasn't living true to myself before this. If I had been I would have known I am more than a.wife and a mother. On my journey through the "who am I" puzzle I have discovered I am a good friend. One more step.
I didn't understand before how envious I am of B. That is not a healthy feeling.
When we got home from the festivities we hit the hot tub, I was very uncomfortable and so I left and went in to shower. Two weeks ago I would not have done this so it was a good step.
I do not like feeling uncomfortable in my home but khas and I talked and he pointed out its his home too. Very true and so we.defined some boundaries and came up with a plan for where my private space is so I can escape when I need to.
Productive painful.... progress.
Dance in the rain...