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Old 08-14-2011, 02:32 PM
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justlost justlost is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Rocky Mtn. Front Range
Posts: 38
Default another day

Yesterday we spent the day together at a Scottish festival ..

Throughout the day I think I handled everything ok. I tried to stay true to my self and khas and bev, I had many moments of jealousy envy and insecurity and stepped away to look at other merchants while I got myself under control.

I have no desire to inflict my vitriol on either of them.

And no I wasn't living true to myself before this. If I had been I would have known I am more than a.wife and a mother. On my journey through the "who am I" puzzle I have discovered I am a good friend. One more step.

I didn't understand before how envious I am of B. That is not a healthy feeling.

When we got home from the festivities we hit the hot tub, I was very uncomfortable and so I left and went in to shower. Two weeks ago I would not have done this so it was a good step.

I do not like feeling uncomfortable in my home but khas and I talked and he pointed out its his home too. Very true and so we.defined some boundaries and came up with a plan for where my private space is so I can escape when I need to.

Productive painful.... progress.
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