First, my background...
I am a 40 year old male, married to a wonderful woman, and I have 2 fantastic kids. I feel like I should be content.
A female friend of mine mentioned the term "polyamorous" to me and it struck a chord. The struggle I am having is that I always believed that ALL guys had issues with monogamy and that it was just something you repressed in order to be a good husband and father.
I have had a relationship with about 25 women (due to a rough childhood, I never was able to really connect with other guys). A good portion of those women I have stayed in touch with as I have had very few bad break ups. Of those exes, there are a couple whom I REALLY miss. I try to meet up with them for lunches and I am hoping to take one to a football game I have tickets for. So, it's not just a sex thing, I just want to spend time with them and be close to them. This is further complicated by the poly friend I have who has already said she loves me and I think I feel the same.
Sorry, if I rambled, but I feel like a confused teen all over again. Is this something that all guys deal with, or am I just wired a little different?