I think it`s to soon, to know if you are still interested in your wife or not. It is still very fresh hurt that you are dealing with.
Maybe,...another 6 months ? Who knows.
While you still lack respect,..not good. Maybe attempt friendship when you are ready, see if you feel mutual respect growing between you both, through new interactions first.
Otherwise, you`ll not ever trust her.
And, she will never trust you.
If you want to keep fucking the new toys, just be honest with all about it. Don`t get cornered into any low-level commitments if you dont want them.