View Single Post
Old 08-10-2011, 05:31 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Oh honey, you're not a packet of ketchup that's expected to get passed around and squeezed out onto your guys' french fries every time you're together.

Let's say you're with Romeo one night and don't feel like getting it on. There's nothing wrong with snuggles, intimacy, and closeness without actual sex. There's nothing wrong with playing fricking Scrabble when together, without having sex. Quality time is quality time. You build your closeness on the things that make each other happy, whether there is sex or not.

And if the next (or another) night in the same week, you are with another guy, you are again not obligated to fuck. But if you want to and it happens, what does it have to do with Romeo (beyond any agreements you have for safer sex and so on)? You don't have to report back to Romeo that you had sex with the other dude, although I'm sure he's want to know that the relationship had gotten to that stage. You can't make sure everyone gets the same amount and bits of you. These are two separate relationships, and each deserve to grow and evolve in their own ways and according to what feels right.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.

Last edited by nycindie; 08-10-2011 at 05:40 PM.
Reply With Quote