There have been times in my three year journey into polyamory when my emotions don't conform to my thoughts and beliefs. My brain says, "Okay, we have thought this through, and this is how we are going to do things", and when the time comes, my emotions throw a tantrum and scream foul play.
Yes, there have been occasions when I get hung up on my wife having sex with other guys. No, I am not afraid of her finding somebody better and then wanting to leave me. I am not afraid that the sex will be more enjoyable with someone else. Truth is, it's a simple as "hey, you're having sex with someone else. That should be me." That I occasionally have sex with other women while my wife is home alone is beside the point. Congratulations! You've just witnessed the male subconscious at work.
So what do I do? Well, I take a big club and beat the emotions into submission. That's all I can do, because I realized these emotions are pure envy. It really isn't a deeper layer of emotions or issues masquerading as envy.
It becomes a battle of will power, one in which you hope your beliefs come out on top. If you don't, then you start behaving in a way that makes the a hypocrite.
Last edited by nicothoe; 08-09-2011 at 06:43 PM.