I think your advice here is very helpful. I wonder, do you have any deeper advice for exploring the parts that are uncomfortable.
Its hard to imagine my husband with another woman because I don't trust most women to be kind and loving....he has been hurt before, and I don't want that for him or us. I have a very fluid sexuality and am open about what I want, but some women just want to play games, which is what I fear. How can I know that the women my husband might meet are (bite my tongue) "safe"? Pain and loss happen in any relationships, but poly isn't for everyone which complicates things even more.
My guess is that ground rules and pacing a relationship would be a great way to overcome the fear of an insane bitch (can I say that here?) playing games. What do you think?...any other good ideas?