About the porn thing, check out
http://yourbrainonporn.com/. It's related someohow to another site which has awesome information about how our brains work when sexually aroused. That is here:
http://www.reuniting.info/science/sex_in_the_brain.
I will respond more personally to your posts, but can't right now as I have to get ready to go out at the moment (and I'm running a diagnostic on my PC as I do that!). Just wanted to give you those links for now.
PS - I loved Auckland when I visited in 1990. When in NZ, I lived most of the time in Manaia, but did spend some good, quality time in Auckland and remember it fondly. I was only visiting Godzone for a couple of months. Still have a pen-pal relationship with a former love that I met in Auckland, but now he's in Whangarei.