I'm sure that it would be different if he had a long-term relationship with someone. I assume that she would know what was going on in his life and would be able to be supportive in ways that a new coffee date person can't be.
When I had a breast cancer scare a few years back it was helpful to us both to have my bf at the time involved. He came to the hospital with us and C could talk to him about his own fears about the whole thing. It was nice to have another perspective and someone else to be a sounding board.
I know that I want him to not give up on this girl that he is interested in. I am hoping that it can just move really slowly and that she doesn't get impatient while not really knowing the whole story about what he has going on at home...
It seems so early to dump heavy stuff on her!! He wants her to know but he's going about it slowly which is fine by me at this point!
Right now I am just trying to be ok with saying that him leaving on dates it not OK right now and that I don't know when I will feel better. I know that we have huge insecurity issues to deal with. We are starting to talk about it. He feels that my MS diagnosis is something that WE are dealing with in OUR life and when I don't talk to him about the problems that I am having either emotionally or physically he feels left out, that he can't help me and it hurts him. I am working on it.
Obviously I need to feel closer to him to ever consider feeling confident with the poly aspects of our life. I need to once again trust that he will never leave me as I always did. The only way to get there is to share and see that he doesn't leave...that is scary as all hell.
Last edited by PickMoreDaisies; 08-05-2011 at 03:25 PM.