Originally Posted by RobertCourage
So I have a general set of goals I am aiming for, but no mandatory path to arrive at these goals. However I get there is fine as long as I stay on target. It is a bit liberating to be less contrained by the rigidity of a set path. But I am not foolish enough to live without any idea of where i would like to go!
I think this is very common in marriages and why so many fail. One of the things I came up with when our marriage councelor asked us for goals to work toward, was I wanted a true "partnership". I think that re-defining things thus helped us step away from "but a marriage is supposed to work like..." mindset. It's so easy to think we are just "supposed" to willingly sacrifice oursleves for marriage (or expect the other person to do this). When I changed my terminology, it was easier to make the adjustments needed as they arose. Speaking up when things are out of whack is just as hard as having to hear it and yet both need to happen.