Just to be clear, I'm not rebuffing your advice or suggestions, nycindie. I'm just trying to get out what's in my head.
At some point (soon, I hope), getting out, meeting people, getting flirty, and coming home is definitely worth doing. I just want to make sure my wife is on board with it, as it seems that the beginnings of poly/mono relationships that had been closed is a fragile time.
And maybe I'll need to wear a cup, to keep that penis under control.
Originally Posted by SoCalExile
Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ on a Popsicle stick- this thread hits incredibly close to home. I'm on the verge of dropping the polybomb myself and 95% of where you're coming from matches mine. We seem to think alike. Were we separated at birth? Even your wife's reactions largely match how I expect mine is going to react.
I should probably start my own thread; I've been toying with the idea for weeks.
But anyway. I just wanted to pop in here, MT, and just give you a general nod of agreement and a thumbs up for having the courage to do what you're doing. I wish I could offer the Voice of Experience, but the veterans seems to have that sewn up pretty tightly already.
I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.
Thanks. Gird yourself regarding "dropping the polybomb." You've already read my experiences. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be, and in the beginning, I felt more pain and fear than I imagined I would. Rehearse what you're going to say. Practice ways of trying to say very, very clearly what you intend to convey. If, as you imagine yourself listening to your words, any of it can be misconstrued, try again. There WILL be misunderstandings. You'll say X, and your partner will hear Y. That's just how it is. You'll repeat parts of the conversation over and over. You'll both shed tears. It'll be hot and cold for awhile.
Or maybe she'll surprise you and will have been thinking the same thing. I wouldn't count on it, though.