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Old 08-03-2011, 05:53 PM
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Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,603

I went to our local poly camp this past weekend. It's the third one I've been to. This year it was a lot different than it has been in previous years. In the past it has been a very family friendly event with families of all shapes and sizes and all ages of children attending. It's one of the few events in the year that facilitate the kids meeting each other and developing their own support group.

This year it was very much about the adults. There was a large clothing optional area where some of the workshops (not with adult content) were held. So for the 2 families with small children we were unable to attend those workshops at the risk of having our children come and find us and making the people who were undressed uncomfortable because there were children around.

I totally understand having workshops of an adult nature (such as BDSM) in the adults only area but workshops on crafting and dating should really have been held somewhere that everyone could comfortably attend.

ETA a bit about what the previous years of camping were like. The last 2 camps that we went on had both adult and child components. There were things planned for the kids during the workshop times so that the adults could attend the workshops. It was also just one big camp, with no segregation of clothed and unclothed. It felt much more like a cohesive community than the camp this time around.

Another thing that I would like to add is that if there is going to be a clothing optional area that it should be in an area that is fenced off in some way from the rest of the campers. There were members of the general public who just happened to pass through the camp on their way to a trail and they got an eyeful of something they weren't expecting. It also goes for anyone else who happens to be there though, clothing optional should be a choice to partake in and to witness. END EDIT

I have to be honest and say that the vibe this year was very much geared towards the single dating poly side of things. It made me feel a little like an outsider and that my way of living poly isn't the right way. I'm not terribly free with my body, never have been, likely never will be and I don't want to feel that to fit in and socialize that I have to be ready to disrobe and available to hook up with someone if the situation happens to present it's self. Maybe that makes me a prude I don't know.

I wrote a letter to one of the organizers because she asked for feedback. The letter has pretty much what I've said here in it. I'm worried that because of feeling this way I will be ostracized by the community. I felt that I had to speak though. Sometimes it feels like if you don't want to date/sleep with everyone in the core organizational crowd that you're not worth socializing with. In some ways it feels a lot like high school.

I do realize that a lot of this is my own stuff that I'm carrying around left over from wanting to fit in in school. I need to change my focus now and focus on all the positive in my life. I'm not willing to compromise myself and who I am at the core to fit in. It would leave me empty and I would regret it. There are plenty of people in my life who do enjoy being around me and who do want to know me simply to know me and not just because they might get into my pants!
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.

Last edited by Derbylicious; 08-03-2011 at 07:02 PM. Reason: Redpepper gave me some more ideas.
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