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Old 08-02-2011, 08:47 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mya View Post
In general on how to keep a LDR fresh, I think it's important to keep contact quite often. That way you get to talk about things that happened during the day, the not-so-important-stuff as well. If you only speak once a week, it's likely that the conversations are more serious and about important subjects. Not necessarily though, but that's my experience. I think sharing the less important things as well keeps the connection in better shape because you feel that the partner is a part of your day to day life.
I don't have a webcam. We were texting every day and talking on the phone once a week. He says he hates talking on the phone (although we never had a phone call for less than 90 minutes). Then he told me he thought texting every day was too much, and when I backed off is when I noticed certain inequities and things started to slide.

So, how to keep an LDR fresh when everyday contact is not desired (or possible)? I would think there has to be a stronger foundation there, but how do you build a long-distance relationship mostly online? This is what perplexes me. It would be different if we met in real life and then were separated, but starting out this way... maybe I'm just too old for this shit. Hmm.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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