One more thought, about porn addiction, which I gather you have. Don't you think that people addicted to porn really have a need for deep, loving sexual contact with others, somewhere buried inside, yet are prevented from having multiple partners per our mono culture (or else they have other social issues preventing irl [in real life] sexual contact at all.).
So, your porn addiction is like junk food. You keep returning to it because you are starving for multiple sexual relationships, and it's the only food available. But it's not nourishing, it's just pictures on a screen, and so you are becoming more and more starved, leading to a vicious cycle taking over your whole life. The definition of an addiction explains how it takes you over, to the detriment of getting out and enjoying other things in life, affecting your ability to work, etc. This is a serious problem, and I am glad you came here looking for help.
Symptoms of addiction:
Tolerance - the need to engage in the addictive behavior more and more to get the desired effect
Withdrawal happens when the person does not take the substance or engage in the activity, and they experience unpleasant symptoms, which are often the opposite of the effects of the addictive behavior
Difficulty cutting down or controlling the addictive behavior
Social, occupational or recreational activities becoming more focused around the addiction, and important social and occupational roles being jeopardized
The person becoming preoccupied with the addiction, spending a lot of time on planning, engaging in, and recovering from the addictive behavior