Have you considered moving back out to your own place? Frankly, what you're describing would be an utter nightmare to me, and if it were me, I'd probably prefer to live with fewer people (in particular, fewer children). The thing about living in a huge household is that messes and chaos tend to build upon each other, and moreover, it's going to be difficult for you to have any control over your living space with so many people involved. Furthermore, having your own space would allow you to schedule in explicit time for your lovers, time that wouldn't interfere with your parenting and household responsibilities.
If that's not an option, I'll echo the other posters and recommend that you explicitly split up tasks, so that you can actually work toward completing your responsibilities and earn some time to yourself. I also recommend that you explicitly try to find a time/space that can be yours, on a regular basis, with no interruptions. As an introvert myself, I think those things are absolutely necessary for maintaining one's sanity.
Good luck! I really hope your situation improves... *hugs*