I'm confused, I got the impression that you were encouraging his dating and now your saying that's not the case. My husband's not a mind reader and I DO have to tell him when I need him to back off of other stuff and just be there for me. It's extra important that I do this when my emotions are all over the place and I give him mixed messages.
Did you tell him that you don't trust him anymore and why? This is an important conversation. Part of me thinks your husband might be an abusive SOB, but I chose to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. From experience, don't play the "assumption game" and expect him to read your emotions and between the lines, this is a dangerous game that no one wins.