Originally Posted by Magdlyn
Oops. Established Relationship Intimacy. Got the abbreviation right, the actual words wrong. hehe!
Intimacy is bigger (and can, or should be, more fulfilling) than mere newbie energy.
I agree wholeheartedly! I think that whole rush of feelings is nice, but really, it's just chemicals, LOL. Maybe my education is ruining me, but the fact is that our bodies dish out a rush of chemicals that's similar to many drugs (and effects the same part of the brain). Eventually the chemicals even out, which is good because otherwise none of us would get anything done!
Now the new part of discovering somebody new is great, and having tons of stuff to talk about...
But for me, knowing I can talk about anything with my hubs, that I can be open and vulnerable with him, that he knows my weaknesses and flaws and still loves me, and that he knows my strengths sometimes better than I do-- that is love. And to me, that is HOME.
One thing I'm learning lately is that it can be easy to fall into ruts with the person we have been in a relationship with. All kinds of ruts, not venturing out to do new stuff together, taking for granted all of the things they do and are for us. The biggest, though, I think is in assuming we completely know them. I know *I* have changed a lot in the past 11 years, why would I assume he hasn't? I'm learning that there can be a lot to discover about that person we have been with for so long... and those discoveries can give that relationship a little bit of new, mixed in with the comfort of old.