K, first things first, you have to look out for number one. That is you, by the way. I had a much better start at this relationship, with honesty, but I have to admit, I went through very much the same reaction pattern. Why can't I be enough, why can't she just love me, why why why...I lost 6 kilos in 10-11 days, and had to get sick leave from work for two weeks. But you will get through this. You have to talk to your partner about how you feel, what your fears are, what you want and what you need to feel reassured that your partner is not leaving you.
This is probably a very troubling time for your partner too, with confusion, choices, hurt and whatnot, and if you're lucky, you are his best friend, and the one he needs to talk to. But that comes second.
FIRST! Eat! Take care of yourself, seek medical help if you need it. Get enough sleep, medicated if you need to, just don't let physical detori...deta...deterioration(?) get in the way of your choices. I know one really can not compare relationships, reaction patterns etc to anyone, but I feel your pain, I really do. Send me a private message if you wanna get in touch on chat or mail, I know how important it is to have someone to talk to in this. Just don't give up. If your relationship is worth fighting for, and your partner is worth fighting for, then step in to the ring. You'll be fighting yourself, but you can win...and come out a hell of a lot stronger.
Mono engaged to poly VanillaCrazyCake
Don't fear god, don't worry about death; What is good is easy to get, and what is terrible is easy to endure.