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Old 07-27-2011, 02:04 AM
serialmonogamist serialmonogamist is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2011
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Hey, FYI, I'm a genealogist and have researched numerous civil records of quite a number of families (for myself and other people) -- enough to tell you that many of our ancestors got divorced wa-a-a-ay before the 1970s! True, divorce was frowned upon, but not exactly forbidden -- there were always ways around it. My ggparents staged fake photographs of my ggfather with another woman (a family friend) even though the split was amicable, just to get around a law that required infidelity to sue for divorce. This was in the early 1920s. Believe me, it was much more common than you think, even among the working class. And often couples split unofficially and just started families with other people. I myself, when my divorce is final, will be the fifth generation divorced in my own family. I have traced divorces that took place in the 18th century. So, it actually is not such a recent development in modern life.
That's interesting. I knew it was allowed in special cases but I didn't know the special cases were commonly simulated to justify common divorce. I've also seen many divorces in my family and out, but after doing it myself, the illusion of it broke down for me. Before I got married, though that marriage was just a piece of paper but after getting divorced I realized that was just a piece of paper too. Everything comes down to the actual people and the underlying relationships, imo.

Quote:
What does that have to do with anything? I do not see the relevance of this statement.
Because people who feel that they are sinning by having sexual fantasies should clear their consciences by embracing polyamory and injecting ethics into their fantasy lives, I think, or at least they should have that option even if they don't want to have simultaneous multiple relationships. Also, I think many people get dishonored as a parent of their ex's children because their ex feels the need to degrade them as a show of preference for a new partner. You don't have to keep sleeping with someone to honor them as the parent of your children, imo - and honoring is a form of love, I think.