Originally Posted by nycindie
Sorry to hear things have been so stressed and full of drama for you all.
Ahh, you already have the answer, grasshopper.
It's always a bit amusing to me how often people come here and post things like, "How do I tell him/her that . . . " and then basically express to the forum everything that needs to be said. Re-read your paragraph. It is direct, clear, and succinct -- and just about everything you could say to her. What else would you possibly need to tell her?
Good point! lol
D has already said to her most of what I wrote. And if the chance arises, I'll mention it again.
Guess I shouldn't be borrowing trouble... I just fear that she doesn't believe it's is better for her to focus more on herself. She is thinking of the reduced time as punishment and that she can "earn" her way back into spending more and more time with D and at his house. I say this because she is *still* saying how much she helps him when she's there and that she never expected anything is return. And maybe she didn't - on a conscious level...
Are there any strategies for helping her get to the point where she believes it is better for her and everyone else involved to have her own interests outside of D? Or is it a matter of waiting for her to realize it on her own? If that's the case, how do I keep from wanting to shake some sense into her?!