Originally Posted by lovinhimloviner
i know this sounds stupid but I didn't talk to him before because i kept hoping I could deal with it on my own and I wouldn't have to bother anyone with how I was feeling.
Very Bad!! We MUST speak with our partners (no matter what kind of relationship we have) about how we are feeling. The land of guessing and assumptions is a very quick way to destroying everything that was good in your relationship. If they aren't hearing us, maybe we need to find new words. For years I thought I was communicating very clearly certain things to my husband, but all he heard was complaining and in turn just tuned me out. I changed my whole approach and everything changed and he heard me.
Start with the positive... "I feel loved when you ... Lately, I have felt that this is missing (or not happening as much) and I really need this from you to not feel pushed aside or neglected." This is about what make you feel good and what you need and feel, not about what he is doing wrong.
Texting on highly emotional topics can also be a recipe for disaster.