I haven't posted here for a long time...things went very bad and I floundered a lot, when maybe I should have sought more support. In a nutshell, last November, 2 months after asking for an open marriage, and one month after admitting he was with another woman already, my husband started another affair with a 3rd woman, one whom he kept secret from his girlfriend and myself. I only found out about it in May, a month after he asked me for a divorce, and even then he lied and told me he'd just met her. The rest came out when a co-worker told me she'd seen them together last December. Sorry about the timeline - clear as mud, no? He's decided he wants to be monogamous with her, that she's 'the one' (after 18 years of marriage to me).
To say that it's been a hard year is putting it mildly. I knew you were here for me but was pretty stuck in the games and lies he was telling, and frankly, felt embarassed to admit to how much he was pulling me around...I'm a stronger person than that, or I was.
I wanted to come back here and just say a heartfelt thank you to everyone who supported me and was so welcoming. It really meant a lot to me. My views on poly were changed, for the better, seeing how you support one another. I've learned so much, and my personal situation hasn't changed that. Maybe some day I'll be back with a better poly experience...I'm not sure if its something I'd openly seek, but if that's what life brings me, my eyes have been opened and I see so much love and support. My experience clearly wasn't truly poly from the start - he had an agenda - but I'm not letting that taint what I've discovered from all of you. My apologies for taking so long to get back here, but I felt it important that I do.
Once again, thank you.