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Old 07-22-2011, 04:39 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New England USA
Posts: 1,231

Hi Newbie,

First - congrats to you for seeing beyond labels and stereotypes and general public myths. The whole '3rd wheel' drama is firmly rooted in the monogamous public perception and ruins a lot of otherwise potentially beautiful relationships.

That said, Clair offered some nice little commentary acknowledging the facts of 'history' and how you will be building your own new 'history' going forward (ALL of you!).

I often explain that it's really no different than beginning a new job or any other new social activity. You are the 'outsider' at first and it will take some variable amount of time before you really feel like an 'insider'. We deal with this throughout our lives - it's not really that big a deal. A little uncomfortable for some at first but the more you do it the more it gets easier.
Why some people think that this should not exist in the realm of relationships is beyond me ! <chuckle>

It's ok to just say "OK guys - remember I'm the outsider - so be kind to me " With a smile.

You'll be fine. Keep things in perspective and above all - ENJOY !

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