Waffles will adjust over time. Annes dogs and I are getting used to each other, and I hate dogs and they hate me, lol.
I have a similar situation that doesn't involve a cat, it involves a third person, Lana. It is surprisingly similar in all reality - Violet and I were together, Lana came around, we brought her in (she is now renting our extra room), we love her to death and we're all close but it's not physical and the emotional side is limited because of the non-actual-girlfriend to either of us status. Then Anne comes along, and Lana loves her to death - but there's clearly issues there. If you figure out how to handle the Waffles situation without resorting to catnip baths, let me know - the insight could help, lol.