Originally Posted by RobertCourage
So I am supposed to be happy he loves her because it increases the love in this world? I love her so much that I can let her love someone else? That's how it works?
Whether you're happy he loves her or not isn't neccessary for poly life. That you be accepting of a partner's ability to receive love other than yours is.
And yes, it is possible to love someone so much that they can be free to love others. Think about that for a bit. Think about it without labels--without poly or mono or swinger... Can a person love someone so much that they can let that person love someone else? Well, isn't that the hallmark of actual loving? If you love someone only because they love you back or only because their genitals maintain a operationally safe distance from everyone else's genital, doesn't that mean your love is based on stipulations? Isn't the purest of loves free from such things?
If wifey is a possession over which you have ownership, then her unauthorized distribution of loving property rights would be a contract violation. If wifey is an independent (some may say autonomous) person, then her entering into a partnership with another party doesn't have to mean that your partnership lacks value. She just needs to update her CRM protocols and realign her vision with something more compatable with the expanded venture.